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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 2,237 Location: nr Southampton
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to want your husband to be home and help you?
I do actually want him to go to work. But I don't have full time care at home and with little Bernice taking up a lot of my carer time (as I need her too) I could really do with him here to run the house etc.
Actually, I could do with a shoulder to cry on and a kiss.
perhaps its just at the moment.
silly rambling woman I am!how to be a velvet bulldoser
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 1/7/2010 Posts: 441 Location: Bristol
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Oh Jenni, you poor thing! I'd like to offer up my shoulder for a cry but I might refrain from suggesting a kiss I don't think you're being a silly rambling woman at all. It all starts to get too much and there are times when you can't see the wood for the trees. Could you not get some additional caring support or possibly some home help for the domestic bits? Wouldn't it drive you nuts having him at home all the time? If it's not just a "at the moment" kind of thing, perhaps a review of needs and the help you're getting may be the answer to reassess where you are. Hope you get your big hug and kiss when he gets home x x x Joanna
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/7/2009 Posts: 235
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Jenni, it does all get too much at times. Muddling through is frustrating and take so much energy, and having a little one as well. Thinking of you
Deb x
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 2,127 Location: Thornton Cleveleys
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Guess the answer is ... it depends on the husband!!!!  Mine is at home all the time, does next to nothing and drives me round the bend! I am able to do far more, even with the RA, when he is out from under my feet! Jenni, you definitely need extra help at this time. You need someone who can devote time to Bernice who I'm sure must be quite a handful (I had 3 under two ... nightmare  ). An additional pair of hands to organise the daily chores and running of the house, leaving Richard to help and care for you. Isn't there any way you can get hold of some additional temporary help to get you over this bad patch? Even a few weeks would be such a bonus and give you the break you need. Oh, if only I lived nearer, I would love to be able to help you out. Perhaps once Gemma is sorted and settled a reassessment of your requirements might be worthwhile and productive, especially in the light of the further problems you are having medically. Hope Richard gets home soon. In the meantime a cyber hug is coming your way  . Take care Jenni, Lyn x
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 872
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Hi jenni Is Richard able to take some leave or maybe to be based at home occassionally? Hope you can get a little more help you deserve this and maybe some more time additionally with Richard Mean while here's a great big hug from me and from Sophie too, who is sitting nearby xxxxx
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 2,237 Location: nr Southampton
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i have had him home all day today and it was bliss. I think he would get v stressed here and it is good for a man (or woman) to work if they can on the whole.
I would hate having to go onto income support and have every bank statement scrutinised- if we have to do it in the future then so be it.
in the meantime I am going to ask for some more care hours.
well, we can try.
Jenni xhow to be a velvet bulldoser
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,081
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You are so brave Jenni, with everything you have gone through recently and adjustments you all have to make on top of your health problems, I would be in a heap on the floor! Definiely need more care hours. It would help if someone could actually tell you exactly what is wrong with you for you to do this. Hope Richard borrowed the red boots.
Julie
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 2,127 Location: Thornton Cleveleys
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Hi Jenni Glad to hear that you got Richard home for the day and that you are considering trying for more care hours. I hope you are successful as you need every scrap of help you can muster at the moment. You are one determined lady with a real fighting spirit but everyone needs a break every now and again! Take care Jenni, Lyn x
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,035 Location: in a house
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My Hubby was a dream when i had the big flare up . he is a lot younger then me works shifts .And will be working a long time as yet as i have 2 years to go . in a way his work is heavy and he works 8 to 10 hours a day sometimes 6 days a week . So has enough to do .But he would help to set up the meal but we both have to eat , My son came home for the summer the year i had a bad flare also worked ( with dad ) but 9 too 5 he also used to help . now i am moblie and not so bad . 50 posts to go to my 1,000 Christine The chocolate eating housewife ...The washer woman .....naughty lady
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 346
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Jenni i have only just read this post, but i picked up a leaflet in the library the other day about a charity called home start i think where a volunteer comes to your house to help you, it's for anyone with a child under five.
Found it online home-start.org.uk
Hope this is of some help.
Bevxx
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,035 Location: in a house
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homestart is very good . they take my friends twins out to the park and mum catches up as she had 3 under 3 . but they are blunt of cutbacks some homestarts are having to cut down . but try them they are good they mind kids while you have a bath all sorts christine The chocolate eating housewife ...The washer woman .....naughty lady
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 2,237 Location: nr Southampton
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thanks about the homestart.
I have been with them and they have sent a lady in for a few hours and now I have asked for the direct payments to continue with her and employ her. she is a single mum with 3 children and it suits her really well.
she is lovely with bernie too.
Jenni xxhow to be a velvet bulldoser
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